Halfwit History

37 - I, Mainer

February 13, 2020 Jonathan & Kiley Season 1 Episode 37
Halfwit History
37 - I, Mainer
Chapters
Halfwit History
37 - I, Mainer
Feb 13, 2020 Season 1 Episode 37
Jonathan & Kiley

This week Kiley spills the beans on what really happens in Maine, while Jonathan discovers that people can be less human than the things we create.

Topics: The Pork and Beans War, Rossum's Universal Robots

Music: "Another Day" by The Fisherman.

You can find us on Facebook, Twitter, and visit our website at www.halfwit-history.com!

Reach Out, Say Hi, or Suggest a Topic at Halfwitpod@gmail.com 

Support the show (https://www.ko-fi.com/halfwithistory)

Show Notes Transcript

This week Kiley spills the beans on what really happens in Maine, while Jonathan discovers that people can be less human than the things we create.

Topics: The Pork and Beans War, Rossum's Universal Robots

Music: "Another Day" by The Fisherman.

You can find us on Facebook, Twitter, and visit our website at www.halfwit-history.com!

Reach Out, Say Hi, or Suggest a Topic at Halfwitpod@gmail.com 

Support the show (https://www.ko-fi.com/halfwithistory)

spk_1:   0:32
hi and welcome to have one history. I'm Jonathan and I'm Kylie. And this is a show where we talk about the upcoming week, but a long time ago.

spk_0:   0:39
I'm not super long ago, but longer than before. If that makes sense,

spk_1:   0:44
Yeah. Where, as you probably guessed from last week, were really bad at guessing what is considered long ago and not it binds within is within a century.

spk_0:   0:56
Mine is not

spk_1:   0:57
okay. We could wait. Just go buy that from now

spk_0:   1:00
on. So anything like older than a century is a long time ago.

spk_1:   1:05
I don't know.

spk_0:   1:07
Like in the grand scope of things. Like when you talk about Pompeii. That was a long time ago.

spk_1:   1:13
That's true. I don't

spk_0:   1:14
know how we gauge it, but clearly we can't. Well, do we

spk_1:   1:17
have any updates from last week?

spk_0:   1:19
I do not.

spk_1:   1:20
I do not either. So when's your thing? Well, we already know it's more than a century ago, so

spk_0:   1:26
Well, that is true. I am in 18. 39 go for Wu. So this week, I want to talk about war ghoul. Ah, but don't worry. This time no one dies. Surprisingly excuse me. Yep. So this war happened happens to take place in my favorite place. Can you guess where? Yes. Finish. This is not the word.

spk_1:   1:52
I wasn't expecting that to actually be the answer.

spk_0:   1:54
It is actually the answer. Um, and it happens in a Ristic main to be exact. And by that I mean, like county, It's fine. Um, which actually arrested County isn't what was once referred to as a Ristic. So yeah, it's I'll get her. I'll get it.

spk_1:   2:13
All right. It's

spk_0:   2:14
confusing. Maine was weird was I'm sticking with that. So to make it even more entertaining, this war is sometimes called the pork and beans war. Yes, you heard me correctly. I did say the pork and beans, boy. Mendoza, we'd you know what's really strange? I could

spk_1:   2:33
a nurse?

spk_0:   2:33
Well, no, but yes. But I couldn't really figure out why. It was also called that, like in my research,

spk_1:   2:42
that is extra strain.

spk_0:   2:43
Yeah, I'm not it. It has to have referred to, like the food or something. You're like a lack of supplies or something like that, but like, it doesn't specifically say so. It's really probably anyone's guess, and there is probably some like main historian out there who actually knows the answer. I do not. So let's dive into it. So this is technically called the Arrested Quarter for Arrested County Slash Not actually there anymore, but was, um and it was a military and civilian involved confrontation in 18. 38 to 18. 39 between the United States and the United Kingdom. You mattered, you know, added Yep, over the international. But I'm not going to do that anymore over the international boundary between the British colony of New Brunswick and the U. S. State of Maine. Clearly so, the Treaty of Paris in 17 83 that ended the American Revolution, um didn't clearly state, um, terribly determined the boundary between British North America, Canada, um, and the newly formed United States. So, like any young enterprising country probably still thumbing its nose at the British, Massachusetts became began issuing land grants in its District of Maine, which would become the state. Unfortunately, that included areas that the British had already laid claim to. So oops, as I'm sure you can imagine, issues started to arise almost immediately and the 17 94 Jay Treaty initiated a commission to determine the source of the ST Ah Croix River like luxury. Like the drink? Probably. I'm saying that because I don't have a pronounce it. So the Saint Croix River was the principal geographical feature identified in the earliest treaty, which apparently no one really knew where said treat her where the river was like. There was, like, a general idea, but not super firm. I guess they didn't really know where it ended. Would you think like following a river wouldn't be that difficult?

spk_1:   5:00
No, that's kind of weird.

spk_0:   5:02
So the commission identified the source to be the Now I'm really gonna butcher this one. She put a Nick Cooke

spk_1:   5:10
Sounds good to

spk_0:   5:10
me. Um, lakes. Those relates, but didn't really work any farther past that. They just decided that the border should run straight north from those lakes. So big enough go from here. Nor did the commission do anything about the numerous islands in passing the quad eBay, which is like I think we're that river ends pretty much is like right along what's now the border of Maine and New Brunswick, the light coastal area. So during the War of 18 12 the British occupied a significant portion of eastern Maine, including Penobscot County, which is where Bangor is for reference. Ah, Hancock County, which is where Bar Harbor is, and Washington County, which is right along the border with New Brunswick. Oh, and I I found this handy dandy map for you.

spk_1:   6:01
Oh, I get visually it is this time.

spk_0:   6:04
So they plan to permanently annexed the region into British North America like that British occupied section of Maine. Fortunately for us, Mainers es que me The Treaty of Ghent in 18 14 ended the war and reestablish the boundary line of the 17 83 Treaty. And as a side note, people living in those regions probably weren't really fazed by the occupation. Occupation? Yeah, that's right. Word as they lived so close to the border. And they continued elicit trade with British North America throughout the war as it was very lucrative to the local communities. So they really probably didn't care if they were technically British or American. Fair enough. The allocation of the islands was still being disputed when Main broke away from Massachusetts in 18 20 the Messiah Seal Island actually continues to be formally disputed between the US and Canada, like to this day, so there's a lot of Ah debate about that. So this became a chief concern to the new state government. Additionally, Massachusetts retained ownership of half the public lands in Maine. Um, and I actually think there are some like, I think Harvard owned some land in Maine and like it's a lot more than you'd expect. But then again, Harvard's such old institution that it kind of makes sense, especially because Maine is so Foresti. And like there's just a lot of land.

spk_1:   7:25
It's very easy for them to own more land the night expect, as I didn't expect any college to just kind of own part of main if it wasn't a main college. So

spk_0:   7:36
okay, so part of the land that Massachusetts retained ownership of was a large part of this disputed territory that they got as part of the separation off main. So for the British, it was more of a concern about how far North Main parachuted into the British North America as it would create a serious hindrance to communications between Canada and its colonial satellites on the Atlantic Seaboard. Securing the northern half of main would cut travel time between Quebec City and Halifax almost in half as it lay directly between them. So having to go around main instead of like crossing through would make it a lot harder.

spk_1:   8:16
Yeah, big pain in the butt.

spk_0:   8:17
I mean, yes, at Main just has a really big top half. I don't really know howto phrase that either means big, just, like, kind of protrudes up and like, there's not a lot up there, Sam, I'm sorry. What, like I mean, that's where all of those like unnamed townships and everything are, It's just it just it happens to be like a lot of it's uninhabited. So to make matters more contentious in 18 25 the Miramichi fire destroyed thousands of acres of prime New Brunswick timber, killed hundreds of settlers and left thousands more homeless and also destroyed several three thriving communities. The Journal entries of the newly appointed governor of New Brunswick record the destruction and comments that survival the survival of New Brunswick depended on the vast forests in the West in the area that was disputed with the United States because they had essentially lost so much in preparation for a U. S. Census in 18 30 the Maine Legislature sent John Dean and Edward James to the disputed area to document the numbers of inhabitants and to assess the extent of what they considered to be British trust pass like how far into the British go. So during that summer, several residents of the West Bank of the ST John River at Mata Wasco filed requests for inclusion of their land in Maine. So, acting on advice from county officials, they called a meeting to select representatives in preparation to incorporate Mattawa. Oska as a town and a local resident from the east bank of the ST John River alerted local representatives from New Brunswick, who then entered the town hall during one of these meetings and threatened to arrest any resident that was attempting to organize.

spk_1:   10:06
Oh boy,

spk_0:   10:06
thanks. Yep. So the meeting continued anyway, and new brought the New Brunswick authorities arrested some residents, while others fled into the woods like teenagers running away from a party. That's literally what I'm imagining is a bunch of drunk old timey Mainers running away. So, um, and then the local American sent letters to the main authorities in Augusta notifying them of what happened. So a neutral third party was asked to arbitrate. And that was King William, the first of the Netherlands.

spk_1:   10:38
Oh, interesting.

spk_0:   10:39
Why him? I have absolutely no idea. No, there was no explanation other than a neutral third party, I guess, because I don't remember exactly when the Dutch gave up claims to like New York. But I feel like it was certainly well after bow before this, so they don't really have any stake in it. So I guess that makes sense sort of about it. I don't know why it would have been him instead of any other leader but whatever. So he was given a topographical map of the disputed area with both parties arguments with detailed scientific and dimple diplomatic evidence for each side. While we can determine now that the American claim was justified by the intentions of the commissioners in 17 83 however, the Treaty of 17 83 was so badly worded that it could not be translated into a practical topographical boundary.

spk_1:   11:34
Oh, no.

spk_0:   11:35
So William gave up. That's

spk_1:   11:38
so weird.

spk_0:   11:40
He called the treaty inexplicable and impractical and essentially compromised by drawing a line between the two listed options. So he pretty much said This is where you claim your boundary goes to And this is where you claim your boundary goes You I'm just gonna say, Draw it up the middle.

spk_1:   11:57
Well, that solves it.

spk_0:   11:58
I mean, yet And it's funny because it kind of reminds me of the whole, like, um, King Solomon and the baby where the two women are both claiming that the baby's there's and Solomon goes, Well, I'll cut it in half and then you both can have half and the actual mother goes, No, she can have it. I would rather the child be alive and the not mother goes great. It's like white. No, do not cut a child in half. Thank you. So, yeah, that's her. Find the others here. Here. Just cut it down the middle. It's fine. So with this now, middle boundary, the U. S. Received 7908 square miles while Britain received 4119 square miles. It doesn't really seem like even split.

spk_1:   12:42
Yeah, it seems like they weren't that great at spatial reasoning.

spk_0:   12:45
I'm assuming you probably have something to do with, like, rivers and like stuff like that that might make it hard to be, like here straight. Even this half of this river is yours. And this one is here. It's not in that

spk_1:   12:58
kind of thing. Or maybe when he was drawing the line, they the British just pulled the paper a little

spk_0:   13:02
bit. Well, no, the u S would have had to have Yeah.

spk_1:   13:05
Oh, yeah, us definitely pulled that paper a little bit to make a crooked line. Well, that's Word's got

spk_0:   13:10
to stay. Yeah. Ah, well, the British government accepted this decision, but Main did not. And the new treaty failed to pass the United States Senate. So good try, William. Although the King had not made a judicial decision from one sat for one side, as had been expected, he had followed the arbitration agreements. Request to quote, make a decision on the points of difference. It just wasn't really what they had both been hoping for. So the American refusal to accept his decision would ultimately cost the United States 900 square miles of territory. Oh, main would have been 900 square miles. Bigger.

spk_1:   13:47
Oh, goodness gracious.

spk_0:   13:50
Yeah, right. So proposed boundaries went back and forth, always refused by the other party. Then, in 18 36 Main took a special census, which resulted in the census representative getting arrested by the British. Whoops. He's so letters from New Brunswick accused the governor of made of bribery and threatened military action if main continue to exercise jurisdiction in the basins of the arrest IQ River and its tributaries. In response, Governor Robert Dunlap of Maine issued a general order announcing that a foreign power had invaded Main Swamp Swamp. So both American and New Brunswick Lumberjacks cut timber in this disputed territory during the winter of 18 38 18 39 according to reports submitted to the main legislature, which resulted in the Battle of Caribou and a couple of other conflicts. And then, on January 24th of 18 39 the Maine Legislature authorized mainland Agent Rufus McIntyre, the Penobscot County sheriff and a posse posse of volunteer Millet militia to the upper a rustic to persuade or pursue and arrest the New Brunswick Lumberjacks. I just really enjoy the term posse. Yeah, I don't know why, but I

spk_1:   15:05
find the lumberjack

spk_0:   15:06
posse of lumberjack CS

spk_1:   15:08
I'm a lumberjack tonight, Okay? What is that from? From Monty Python. Oh, I

spk_0:   15:13
don't think I remember that. So arriving at t 10 are five. An unnamed Maine township in the disputed area

spk_1:   15:21
isn't still named that

spk_0:   15:24
I believe. Um, the posse established a camp at the junction of the ST Croix and a rustic rivers and began confiscating New Brunswick lumbering equipment and sending any lumberman caught and arrested back to Maine for trial. Fun fact main still has some of these unnamed townships. Mmm, yep. Not so much in the like eastern part of Maine, but a lot more in, like the Northwest with, like, um, a lot of like, forested areas in that kind of thing

spk_1:   15:59
approach in Canada.

spk_0:   16:00
Yes. So a group of New Brunswick lumberman learned of these activities and unable to retrieve their oxen, and horses broke into the arsenal own Woodstock to arm themselves. They gathered their own posse and sees the man mainland agent and his assistance in the middle of the night. So they kidnapped him. At that point, it's not being seized for trespassing. Is kidnapping Good point. This New Brunswick posse transported the main officials in chains to Woodstock and held them for a quote interview. And by that I'm pretty sure we can probably assume being beaten and threatened, because that's just how the world works. So the British representative demanded removal from the region of all main forces. He then sent his military commander to the T 10 are five campsite and ordered the main militia toe leave. Captain Rhines. And this is where I dove into a really deep hole, trying to figure out how my family line is connected to him. My great aunts married name is Rhines,

spk_1:   17:02
and we're in Maine. So one in Maine.

spk_0:   17:04
So I'm like, I'm pretty sure this is like some like, great great great great great great great great great grandfather.

spk_1:   17:09
How far did you actually get cause I just I watched you do that for longer than you did the notes.

spk_0:   17:14
Um, well, I actually never got to looking at Ryan's. I was too fascinated by my own direct family tree, and I got back to early 18 hundreds. I think the earliest one I had was, like, 18 09 or something like that. That's pretty cool. Yeah, um, I was not willing to pay for ancestry. Therefore, I could only use the super free stuff which is significantly less than the first time I tried to Matt my family history because I know the first time I did it in like high school. I got back like, two grandfathers on my dad's side and then found someone else's like, complete family tree that ended with that relative. And I got all the way back to, like, the first person in my family to come to the U S from England. And it he was born in, like, 16 05 or something like that. And like, I know from my past experience, um, as a historical interpreter that, um pem a quid, which is part of like where I'm from, um, was settled by settled. I mean, like fishermen, like came from England every summer from the like late 15 hundreds on. So that relative that came had to have been one of the first round of like, permanent settlers to this area. No, that's what I thought I was like, Oh, hey, look like confirmation kind of thing. But because I wasn't willing to pay, I could not find that again with a little sad about it. So Captain Ryan's and the others refused to leave stating that they were following orders and doing their duty. The main side then took the New Brunswick military commander himself into custody. So hostage, good job guys, which seemed like the perfect way to us escalate the problem to me. Also, the reason we're talking about this is that on February 15th of 18 39 the Maine Legislature authorized militia Major General Isaac Hudson to lead 1000 additional volunteers to augment the posse on the upper arrested River a k. They officially declared war because they sent actual, like, national military kind of thing.

spk_1:   19:32
Yeah, I just want to make a quick aside that for some reason, someone's mowing their lawn in the winter. Right now,

spk_0:   19:41
I feel like it has to be someone like Snow Blower.

spk_1:   19:44
But all the snow was gone,

spk_0:   19:46
but it really does sound like a lawn mower.

spk_1:   19:49
It just gave me like, PTSD flashbacks to we're still recording upstairs late at night, and that lawnmower just kept mowing the lawn and we would wait every 10 15 minutes after they started to be like, Okay, here we go. We're safe because that was before we had good audio equipment. So are Blue Yeti picked up that lawnmower like crazy

spk_0:   20:12
everything. It picked up everything.

spk_1:   20:14
And this guy mowed his lawn from like, eight o'clock at night to 11 o'clock at night as we were trying to record our podcast.

spk_0:   20:22
It was the most ridiculous thing.

spk_1:   20:25
Anyways, back to your story

spk_0:   20:26
really does sound like a long

spk_1:   20:28
it does. It sounds like someone's mowing their lawn in gosh darn winter right now, huh?

spk_0:   20:33
All right, so additional correspondents from Governor John Harvey of New Brunswick reports of British Army troops arriving from the West Indies. There are reports of the Mohawk Nation offering their service is to Quebec and additional reports of New Brunswick forces gathering on the ST John River, which all resulted in the issuance of General Order Number seven on February 19th of 18 39 calling for a general draft of Main Militia. I don't know if that was the first like official like Main Draft, but so I'm gonna say it is So. Congress debated the issue, and by May 18 39 Congress authorized a force of 50,000 men and appropriated $10 million placed it at the disposal of the president in the event that foreign military troops crossed into the United States territory during the congressional recess of summer of the summer of 18 39 so not willing to not take their vacation. Just said, Here, here's this money in this troops. If something does actually happen, they were prepared, which is more than we can say for the current administration won't want. It always seems that's things catch people off guard. So the British also sent forces to protect their claim to the disputed land, which basically created a standoff between the Mainers and the British. The two nations agreed to refer the dispute to a boundary commission, but further clashes between their forces continued. In the in term, neither nation wanted a war that would have greatly interfered with both nations trade and Daniel Webster, the New Hampshire and Maine representative to Congress, because at this point in time, one person represented both states. Hail Oh Um, and then Alexander Bearing, who was the first baron of Ashburn, congregated from both sides and were able to reach a compromise. The Webster Ashburn Treaty of Washington in 18 42 which settled the main candida boundary and the boundary between Canada and New Hampshire, and then Michigan and Minnesota and Canada. That faction it awarded 7000 and 15 square miles to the United States in 5012 square miles to the British and the British retained the northern area of the disputed territory, including the Halifax Road, which had you around overland. Military communications between Quebec and Nova Scotia. And the U. S government agreed to pay the states of Maine Massachusetts ah, $150,000 each for the loss of the lands of their states, while the U. S reimburse them for the newly acquired territory in the Northwest Territories, as well as the expenses incurred during the time mains. Armed civil posse administered the truce period, so they lost on land. But they got a lot of money.

spk_1:   23:28
That's always nice. Yes.

spk_0:   23:29
Yeah, right.

spk_1:   23:31
I could use a lot of money.

spk_0:   23:32
Yeah, so add a little bit of intrigue. Apparently, both sides hid maps that actually supported the opposing claim to the land. So went the wrist. Yes, right. So Webster concealed a map that was found in the Paris archives, which supposedly Ben Franklin had marked with a red line like way back when that helped persuade Maine and Massachusetts to accept the treaty like when the revolution ended. Likewise, the British Foreign Office acted similarly by hiding what was called the Mitchells map, which generally supported the American case and a fun fact. The Mitchells map was used as a primary map source during the Treaty of Paris for defining the boundaries of the newly independent United States, and has remained important for resolving border disputes between the United States and Canada as recently as the 8th 19 eighties.

spk_1:   24:25
That's more recent than I expected.

spk_0:   24:27
Right? Apparently there was a dispute over the Gulf of Maine fisheries, and this map helped like detail exactly what belonged to who and how to deal with it. It's the most comprehensive map of eastern North America that was made during the colonial era, and it's about six and 1/2 feet by four and 1/2 feet in size. Whoa, that's a big old map. So because this Mitchell's map placed almost the entirety of the disputed land on the US side, some claim that the British officials created the Franklin maps of the one that supposedly Benjamin Franklin marked Red Line on to show where the main boundary was. When can

spk_1:   25:03
they pulled the paper in? The got bigger.

spk_0:   25:05
Well, the British would have pulled the paper on this one. So the Franklin map supposedly supported the British cause for their land, where the Mitchell map supported the Americans. And so people claim that the British actually fabricated the Franklin map to pressure the American negotiators into giving away more territory than they would have because of the Mitchell map was the real one, which now we're pretty certain that that was like the actual one like because it was used during the end of the revolution and stuff, Um, that's and how accurate it is is. The other thing is that it's so well done and, like, accurate, that clear like clearly it was like of importance, because no one would put that much effort into a map that wasn't doing a used

spk_1:   25:51
that was just supposed to be, Ah, a fake,

spk_0:   25:53
right? So there's there's a lot of thought that maybe the British just like, made it up to try and school the Americans and it it worked because if the Americans hadn't had that map been like, oh, we're going to get more land than we actually should have. They wouldn't have given up any. Right? So who knows? But that's theorist ic war. And as a side note, remember how I said no one died in this war?

spk_1:   26:20
Did you lie?

spk_0:   26:21
Well, Not fully lie, sort of. No one died from combat. Two British soldiers were injured by bears. Oh, um, I'm pretty sure they survived. It didn't specify, but it did just say they were injured. And not that they were killed by bears. Some going would. They were just injured by bears and then survived wolf. But there were 38 accident or disease related deaths on both sides. But they don't count as like war dust because it wasn't from active combat because, theoretically, like you could die from a disease or a kn accident anywhere. And it doesn't matter what you're doing, but I grew. I feel like certain diseases in certain accidents. There would probably be more likely in this sort of situation, but I'm not the one who makes those choices. So the result of this war was major consequences on the state's rights to use military force on their own. Um, from the understanding that the main purpose was to address internal conflicts, which this clue we wasn't. In the aftermath of the crisis, the federal government assumed complete control over military matters. And this war was the last serious confrontation between the US and the United Kingdom.

spk_1:   27:39
Very interesting. Pork

spk_0:   27:41
and beans. Yes, you'll don't know why, and it's going to bother me, probably until I die. Probably. But where my visual aids? Helpful?

spk_1:   27:52
Yes, I was following along

spk_0:   27:53
who I've done them before and forgotten to give them to you. I know that's a sad part

spk_1:   28:01
I saw. My topic is on February 11th of 1938. The BBC television produces the world's first ever science fiction television program, an adaptation of a section of Carol Kaye epics. Play are You Are and this play coined the term robot.

spk_0:   28:21
Oh, interesting,

spk_1:   28:22
Yeah, so we got to first in one date, first TV, sci fi and also well, I guess the play was written before here, but it was showcasing the first literature that used the word robot.

spk_0:   28:37
Interesting thing.

spk_1:   28:38
This ended up displacing older words such as Tom Aton and Android, which I didn't realize where older

spk_0:   28:44
words I didn't either.

spk_1:   28:47
Yeah, so I guess everyone used to call him a Tom Collins and Androids. I thought that that was something that we made up in science fiction, that people actually called things.

spk_0:   28:55
I feel like I understand it, Tom Aton, because, like, just like like the origins of the words But android I'm surprised about

spk_1:   29:03
Yeah, um, Carol Kaye Packwood actually attribute the use of the word robot, too. His brother is a true inventor. And the reason why they made the name robot was that in such it means forced labor. So it was very similar to serves serfs in medieval times. I had to perform their Why did that in such robot meant forced labor and was specific to the kind that serfs performed to their masters lands and was derived from an older word, RAB meaning slave. So I also thought it was kind of interesting that for being kind of a little known such publication with very few remakes like, Well, I was trying to find out how I could watch this thing or listen to it. And there really wasn't anything There was like a school play.

spk_0:   29:53
Oh,

spk_1:   29:54
one point is wild. Once I get into the actual story of this thing that well, But there's a ton of references in pop culture to our You are Dr Ross. Um, who which are you? R stands for Rossen's universal robots.

spk_0:   30:10
Okay,

spk_1:   30:11
um, there's a lot of references to argue our Dr Ross, Um, and the creator Carol Catholic. Some of these references include shows like Doctor Who, Batman, the animated series Star Trek and Futurama All had different references to this play in them.

spk_0:   30:28
Now I'm like, racking my brain, trying to figure out where it wasn't future Rama.

spk_1:   30:32
In Futurama, they visit a planet that is entirely inhabited by robots. When Bender is Yes, I think he's like going to a religious thing. And he's going to this planet where the religion is all robots.

spk_0:   30:48
Yes. Yeah, yes. Okay. Remember that

spk_1:   30:51
called K Peck nine, which is the last name of the author who wrote Blossoms Universal Robots. Geez. Yeah. So there isn't actually too much to talk about on the play, so I'm done non

spk_0:   31:02
paying through the

spk_1:   31:04
only real historical significance being the side if I play, That shit was shown on BBC and it was only a portion of a single act. By the way, it wasn't even the whole thing. It was They just played a portion of it on the BBC.

spk_0:   31:20
Huh? Did they leave out anything super inappropriate?

spk_1:   31:24
No, There wasn't really anything inappropriate. It was just kind of a weird, fair play. Anyways, I ended up finding a audiobook of the play

spk_0:   31:33
on its entirety. Are they down?

spk_1:   31:35
So I took some notes and figured a weed. Recap that. Guess if you're super interested in listening to the full version on your own, probably just skip ahead to our fund fax, which

spk_0:   31:45
in the last few minutes,

spk_1:   31:47
but seeing how it's been nearly a century and it was never really that popular, I have a feeling most of you would appreciate this spark notes version of the play I'm about to go

spk_0:   31:57
through. I mean, I know I would, Yes.

spk_1:   32:00
Uh, it's not great quality. Just as a heads up, it's Yeah, if you if you ever try and listen to that, it's it's bad. It randomly switches in the middle of sentences from mono to stereo. Oh, so which, which is funny, because I never thought that I knew the difference between the two like that until I heard it accidentally switched between my

spk_0:   32:24
Yeah, I don't know if I'd recognize the difference, either.

spk_1:   32:26
It's really obvious once you once you hear it. Oh, jeez. Yeah, and the voice actors air. Not phenomenal, either.

spk_0:   32:33
Oh, no.

spk_1:   32:34
But there is. There is one of the main characters is Helena. Her voice actress was actually really good. She seemed like the only person who actually put, like a lot of effort into trying to do this

spk_0:   32:46
or any effort.

spk_1:   32:47
No, I think some people put effort. It was just it was just strange listening to. So go listen to it if you like that kind of stuff. But it is definitely a hard listen. I listened on sped up speed. I did not listen at regular speed.

spk_0:   32:59
I think I'll just go with your SparkNotes variation in color today.

spk_1:   33:03
Well, without further ado, then this is a summary of Rossen's universal robots.

spk_0:   33:09
All right,

spk_1:   33:10
it starts in our you are at Rossen's Universal Robots. In a factory of the universal robots, a woman named Helena Helena Glory, who is the daughter of a president of our U. R. Visits the factory, but when she gets there, she's told she's forbidden to look into the factory any further.

spk_0:   33:27
Ah, that's weird.

spk_1:   33:29
Yep. The process of making robots is secret. Instantly suspicious. Yeah, especially because she's, like the president's daughter. Like, you

spk_0:   33:38
think they would,

spk_1:   33:38
like, show around like something, and they were just like, uh, no, we're not gonna do that.

spk_0:   33:42
Right. But like, new question, why is her last name Glory?

spk_1:   33:46
I don't know. It was just the name of the president.

spk_0:   33:49
Okay, I guess I was assuming the president's last name

spk_1:   33:52
was Ross. Um, no, we'll get to

spk_0:   33:54
Okay. Okay. Cool. Cool.

spk_1:   33:57
So, throughout this whole thing, every time Helena speaks, she is interrupted by the main scientist named Doman,

spk_0:   34:04
Of course.

spk_1:   34:05
Yeah, it was aggravating toe. Listen to. And it was funny, because in the play, she calls him out on interrupting her all the time. Oliver sentences

spk_0:   34:14
good. It

spk_1:   34:15
doesn't stop this man from doing it.

spk_0:   34:17
Well, does it ever

spk_1:   34:18
Mmm mmm Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm.

spk_0:   34:22
That's the right answer.

spk_1:   34:24
So, as you can already tell, Doman is just kind of a creep at all times. And he keeps telling Helena that he wants her to stay because she's young God. He specifically mentions that he estimates she's either 21 or 22.

spk_0:   34:38
Oh, dear God. What? That during

spk_1:   34:41
that up in, like your first conversation with someone

spk_0:   34:43
that just sounds like serial killer Creepy?

spk_1:   34:46
Yeah, it doesn't get any better.

spk_0:   34:47
Oh, good.

spk_1:   34:48
So anyways, he starts talking about Ross, um, and the history of Rossen's universal robots. So, Ross, um, was a physiologist who studied marine life and discovered a chemical that helps develop life. Through his study, he found that nature can only produce one process of life. And he figures out how to get from this chemical a different process than natural, the natural, like trees of life. So the natural branches of evolution and all that

spk_0:   35:14
stuff

spk_1:   35:15
which already conspicuous, Ah, science going on here because how

spk_0:   35:20
do you

spk_1:   35:20
pull something from nature that doesn't conform to nature's evolution?

spk_0:   35:24
Or I that it seems a little wonky to me.

spk_1:   35:28
I mean, I'll give him credit. This was in 19 twenties. So, like, that's champ, anything could have been possible then. Medicine wasn't even real until 1980. So

spk_0:   35:38
right,

spk_1:   35:40
So don't dimensions that Ross, um, had no humor, which I thought was kind of ironic right away, because this guy is just a cz odd in creepy, um, great Ross, um said or Doman said that Ross and wanted to make a man right away and was a little bit smart and tried to make a dog first, but it died horrendously fast, uh, and then continued on to trying to make a man.

spk_0:   36:04
Oh, great.

spk_1:   36:06
What Doman says people don't tell you in school is that Rawson was actually insane, because I guess at this point, Rossen's universal robots is pretty well known. And people have robots. For one thing or another, it's pretty common.

spk_0:   36:21
Why do I suddenly feel like a robot? Revolution is coming. They rise up in.

spk_1:   36:26
It is

spk_0:   36:27
great. All right. It was like the plan of the apes.

spk_1:   36:30
I would say more like I robot.

spk_0:   36:32
I've never seen that. Okay, I'm sorry.

spk_1:   36:36
So Rawson was insane, and he just wanted to prove that God was no longer necessary. It took Ross, um, 10 years to make the first man, and it died in three weeks. And then there was a young Ross. Um, they never explain if young Rossen was related. Told Ross, um, but okay. Just kind of bring him up and So there was a young Ross Emma's well, and while old Rawson made physio horrors, young Ross, um, was an engineer that believed biology was too complicated and he just wanted to make money off of robots. So 11 was a mad scientist. One was a shrewd businessman.

spk_0:   37:11
I mean,

spk_1:   37:12
we'll find out that Doman is neither smart enough to be a mad scientist or a businessman.

spk_0:   37:18
Yeah, that sounds very is

spk_1:   37:20
the guy who's like currently running the company, even though there is like a president,

spk_0:   37:24
that sounds about right.

spk_1:   37:25
Yeah, so one of the major philosophy is that the Rossen's had about the robots that they go on to describe. There's just a lot of description in this first act is that he believes that feeling happy, playing piano, going on walks and doing things like that are unnecessary and that machines do not need this and it makes them flawed. The product of a robot must be practical, and new man must be a worker. Uniqueness makes workers more expensive. A soul makes people in perfect. They tried making giant robots at some point, and their limbs kept falling off. They just mentioned this just for no reason whatsoever, then goes on to say that the first sold robot was used as a street sweeper and that these robots live for about 20 years, and then they die or used up. So

spk_0:   38:12
what happens when a robot

spk_1:   38:13
dies? So at the factory, they just put them into a grinder. They put him into a grinder, use their parts to make more robots.

spk_0:   38:21
Oh, God,

spk_1:   38:22
yes. Uh, I mean, what what else do you do with bad electronics? You recycle him. Ah. So they also mentioned that robots are intentionally made with different resolutions or qualities. So there's workers that air rough. And then he calls in a woman named Sola to be an example of a best grade robot. Because she has skin in sounds human. And Helena gets extremely concerned when she finds out that the woman that letter into this office was a robot and not a woman.

spk_0:   38:54
Oh, boy is the person she's talking to a robot. I'll get to

spk_1:   38:58
that later. He's not in the story. He's not. But like I have, like, some of my own, like thoughts about how the story went.

spk_0:   39:05
Okay. All right, all right. And I'm envisioning just like robot. Like, um,

spk_1:   39:11
Blade Runner.

spk_0:   39:12
Is that the one that we watched with, um, Bill Weasley? Oh, they kill the

spk_1:   39:17
x mas maca.

spk_0:   39:19
Yes, yes, that's what I'm envisioning.

spk_1:   39:21
Now, Doman says he'll have sole a dissected to prove to Helena that schools of robots. Since she believes that Doman is lying about solar being. Roma and Sula and another robot in the room explain that they are completely fine with death, and they view it as just ceasing to move. And Helen is obviously very upset. She's like near crying at this point, and domains like, Oh, don't worry about this because all of the officials that are you are robots are finance. Our workers are need er's, he says need. And he hasn't yet explained at this point that there is a paste that makes the robots, and they have the robot's needing the paste to make the other robots. It's really weird,

spk_0:   40:04
like meeting like me.

spk_1:   40:05
We need to

spk_0:   40:05
go. Yo God yet meeting. Sorry, I don't know. Why has the kneading

spk_1:   40:10
bread? Yeah, you weirdo. Doubly so. They also have, like, factories for the nerves that they call the spinning rooms. And they create like intestines and skin and brains and bones in it. I

spk_0:   40:22
was sitting

spk_1:   40:22
here thinking that it was just like, you know, like a robot covered in flesh, and it's like, No, no, no.

spk_0:   40:28
They made a human

spk_1:   40:30
made a person like

spk_0:   40:31
think

spk_1:   40:32
they keep saying robot. But this is in fact, a person.

spk_0:   40:35
Remember our conversation earlier about people packed bonding with room? Baz?

spk_1:   40:39
Yeah, pack bonded with this robot.

spk_0:   40:41
I'm feeling very much like that already, and I haven't even met this robot.

spk_1:   40:46
So yeah, Doman admits that there's actually only a handful of other humans on this island that the factory is on, and none of them are women. He feels the need to mention

spk_0:   40:56
Oh, well, he's implying he's scoring the robots. Well, I would assume

spk_1:   41:02
it's weird he makes No, he doesn't say anything like that. He just mentions that they they generally feel trapped because there's so few of them in so many robots.

spk_0:   41:12
Um,

spk_1:   41:13
but he also doesn't sound concerned when he says it. It's very strange. I don't want to knock the play, but it doesn't seem to make much sense. And maybe that's just bad translation. But

spk_0:   41:24
maybe my definitely

spk_1:   41:25
not how real humans would interact with

spk_0:   41:28
my next, like instant thought was, Oh, he's going to try and keep Helena there forever.

spk_1:   41:33
I mean, probably Yanks. Oh, yeah, that's right in my notes right here.

spk_0:   41:37
Okay.

spk_1:   41:38
The scientists all feel cursed working there because of the because of this whole ordeal, Which is why he's going to ask Helena to stay longer.

spk_0:   41:45
Sanogo say no.

spk_1:   41:47
Yeah, I wrote in my notes right here. This man is a creep. Is oId

spk_0:   41:50
Yep. Run run far away, far away.

spk_1:   41:54
So she goes to and then all the other doctors enter the room All the scientists and doctors that are actually human, great. And Helena, ask them if they're distressed, is toe how they live. So let's just say that they're not And Helena brings up that her real reason for being there is that she's actually from a group called the Humanity League that is trying to free robots from the R. U R

spk_0:   42:14
O

spk_1:   42:15
and Helena. Helena couldn't tell the difference between the scientists being humans or robots. So when she's telling them this, she thinks that there more robots and that they're gonna rise up and escape with her. But They're really just the other hero now because she's just so confused at this point is that he was a robot who's not.

spk_0:   42:32
It sounds like that's justified.

spk_1:   42:34
Yeah, so she asked, Why there even allowing her to stay here after she admits that she's from a group trying to free robots and they respond, It's these doctors air weird. They talk like they finish each other's sentences almost like how Domain's always finishing Helena's sentences. But they just kind of all do that all the time. So, like a few over like every ship brings missionaries and other ones like and anarchists and other ones and Salvation Army's. And it's astonishing how many idiots there are in this world. So that's how they view everybody else.

spk_0:   43:04
Oh boy.

spk_1:   43:05
Yep. So Doman eventually caves and says, How about we let you visit these robots now that we know why you're here? And he brings them to a warehouse where 347,000 robots are there that Helena can interact with? And she asked if they ever tried showing them like compassion or love. And they mention that there's nothing harder to love than a robot.

spk_0:   43:26
Oh,

spk_1:   43:27
yep, So she's She's just keeps getting more and more upset that they keep rejecting robots. Humanity essentially, and they just don't care it all.

spk_0:   43:38
I feel like in this instance, I agree link with her,

spk_1:   43:41
Yeah, I mean, I think we're supposed to, as as the audience

spk_0:   43:45
doesn't say, But then again, I named my Elektronik So like like the archive has names for all of our printers. I'm not kidding. I printed

spk_1:   43:55
this. So Helena mentions that her Humanity League's purposes to make sure that the robots aren't being hurt in The scientists agree that their assets should be treated properly, and they asked her to be added to the humanity

spk_0:   44:07
leak. Wait, What?

spk_1:   44:09
Yeah, basically, it was like, Oh, add us to this. We agree our stuff shouldn't be treated poorly, but they keep referring to it as like stuff. At that point, they're still not being like, oh, these air things that deserve happiness or whatever they're like, Oh, no, don't treat our creations poorly. And

spk_0:   44:24
this is when they

spk_1:   44:24
bring up that the robots do experience something like a soul because they've noticed that their robots, every once in a while will stop throw down everything they're doing and just sit there gnashing their teeth.

spk_0:   44:37
Sounds like our robotic mental breakdown to me.

spk_1:   44:40
Yeah, And because of this, they want to give them better nerves that can transmit pain. Not just like touching

spk_0:   44:49
things. No.

spk_1:   44:50
Think introduced to the robot's suffering?

spk_0:   44:52
No, very

spk_1:   44:55
specifically, that they need suffering to know when they are harming themselves. If they are harmed, they cannot work. And if they're not working, they're not efficient.

spk_0:   45:03
So, like they could be thrown away and recycled, right? Ah,

spk_1:   45:07
and they mentioned that they tried to this a few times already. When they get recycled, there's just horrible scream.

spk_0:   45:13
Yeah, you think so? If they gave them pain and then your recycling them the heck, all

spk_1:   45:19
the main reason they're doing this like Doman steps back in because Helen is like losing her brain.

spk_0:   45:25
So Abi yeah,

spk_1:   45:27
and he steps in and he's like, Well, just so you know, we only do this because labor gets better in all life gets better if we do this because all costs go down because we're only charging 75 cents an hour for the robots to do what they need to d'oh like they're not paying the robots, but it costs 75 cents an hour to maintain a robot. So with all of the labor being nearly free, humans don't have to do anything because they don't have to make money. So they don't have to work so that humans could just do what they want to do. So basically, we've gotten to the crux of this whole play where they're trying to set up Utopia.

spk_0:   46:03
Oh, boy.

spk_1:   46:04
Because they if if no one needs to work, then you can do what you want to do, which is actually fairly sound like if you aren't relying on money, you can focus on things that make you happy. And generally things that make you happy contribute to the rest of society. So

spk_0:   46:20
well, I mean, as long as you're not a serial killer, right?

spk_1:   46:24
I mean, they're so will be. But for the most part, these guys were just trying to take money out of the equation. And if money's out of the equation than humans can live in a utopia. And this is where we get, like, the classic like, um, a racer of the oppressed going on. And I think this is actually kind of ah, cool thing to talk about in sci fi is that there is no such thing as a utopia that doesn't a press one group. Yes. You can never have a tope utopia that is not oppressive to something. Yeah, and there's just not a way to do it. No. So they've just decided that they're oppressed. Will be these robots

spk_0:   46:59
if you're so bad for the robot. Oh,

spk_1:   47:03
yes. And they think that once this utopia sets in, that man will become the lord of creation. And they will be able to do nothing but perfect themselves and everything that they enjoy.

spk_0:   47:12
Oh, boy. And then Doman

spk_1:   47:15
as Helena to marry him.

spk_0:   47:17
Add That's a non sequitur or

spk_1:   47:18
yep, Does it just pops right up he goes, Oh, will you marry me? And she rejects him and he said, Good night, That's fine. But she'll have to marry one of the other side. No and no. Why? And he's like, Well, you would be cruel to refuse us all. So super Ray P.

spk_0:   47:33
What the heck? Yeah,

spk_1:   47:35
So many other women have come here, but none of the women have made all of the scientists lose their heads like Helena has, and Doman violently grabs her shoulders and tells it, tells her to stare him in the eyes and say no if she truly means it. And she turns her head away and says, You're hurting me. And then she forcefully is kissed by Doman. No, Yeah, yeah,

spk_0:   47:57
it's really,

spk_1:   47:58
really weird, really, because just then all the other scientists run back in the room, clapping and congratulating them on getting married.

spk_0:   48:06
No,

spk_1:   48:07
that's how Act one ends the fuck. Yeah, really weird. So in Act 2 10 years have passed and

spk_0:   48:15
we'll tell me she laughed. No. Oh,

spk_1:   48:20
because we start Act two in Helena's bedroom on the island.

spk_0:   48:25
I have so many issues with this.

spk_1:   48:27
Yep. So 10 years of passes Act one and we open in Helena's bedroom with all the scientists sneaking into her room. What, to deliver her? Some plants.

spk_0:   48:38
I repeat what? The EFF.

spk_1:   48:40
Yeah, so they're literally like Crouch sneaking just like putting plants over her bedroom and then leave.

spk_0:   48:46
Why? I

spk_1:   48:47
don't know. I can assume that there's some badge manipulation going on here, but it can't be because one of the scientists, their plant they like, made it and they named it after her, like Krystle, Liam Helena or something like that, like the new species of plants. So, like it's not, it's not. Ah, mistaken translation because one of them made a plant for her.

spk_0:   49:10
I do not like I'm so uncomfortable.

spk_1:   49:12
And then they start talking about whether or not that they can talk while they're in the room because she's still asleep and she doesn't know anything about quote unquote it,

spk_0:   49:21
uh,

spk_1:   49:22
I don't I don't know. I

spk_0:   49:23
don't know why someone would ever in

spk_1:   49:25
this like this. It's It's just crazy, and they mention that there's no sign of a ship, so things must be pretty bad. I I don't know.

spk_0:   49:32
I don't I I'm so confused.

spk_1:   49:35
So when they all sneak out, Helena wakes up and she calls in her hand. Made in. There's a robot that she's particularly interested in named Radius, who takes care of the library and has been starting to have frequent outbursts. And she asked to see Radius Helena, then spots the flowers and ask the handmade and why they were there. And her response is why it's the end of the world, literally like that. Like question mark

spk_0:   49:59
like why? It's the end of the world.

spk_1:   50:01
And she's like, What are you talking about? And she's like, I don't know. And then her husband, Doman, enters the flowers air for the anniversary of them meeting because it's 10 years later, Jesus! And he says

spk_0:   50:14
he

spk_1:   50:14
didn't remember that this was the anniversary, But one of the other scientists

spk_0:   50:18
did. Oh my God,

spk_1:   50:20
Yeah, like they all got her presence. And he's like, Oh, I in my pocket there's another president and she reaches in and pulls out like pearls from his pocket like pearl necklace. Okay, She's like, Oh, my God, thank you so much. And he's like, This one's not for me. That was from another scientist. I have another thing for you and what He's a reach in this pocket. It was the other pocket, and she pulls out another gift and it's a revolver. And he goes, Oops, not that one. Try again.

spk_0:   50:47
What? The actual hack?

spk_1:   50:49
Yep. So now there's a revolver in the mix. Don't

spk_0:   50:51
know what's happening. I did. When was this written?

spk_1:   50:56
In 1920.

spk_0:   50:57
Was this person? Hi,

spk_1:   50:59
I I have no idea. I'm still gonna lean on. It's probably just a bad translation that's making this so choppy, but

spk_0:   51:07
late translation from from such Okay, yeah, yeah. I mean, maybe probably could be.

spk_1:   51:15
I don't know, we're gonna continue because I've got more pages and we're running

spk_0:   51:18
out of time ago.

spk_1:   51:19
So domains actual present to her is a ship. And she is as confused as I am, as I wrote in my notes,

spk_0:   51:26
like a full size ship,

spk_1:   51:28
like a ship down in the harbor that she can see from her window. Okay. Yep. And he says it's for her to take trips. But then she points out that it's a gunboat, and he's like, No, it's not really a gunboat. And I'm just like, it's really annoying how little he thinks of this person.

spk_0:   51:43
I

spk_1:   51:43
just like this'd is this is a battleship. And she goes, Hey, why is my boat for taking trips of battleship? And he goes, It's not and just expects that to be the answer.

spk_0:   51:52
It's like, Dude, I can see the cannons on this.

spk_1:   51:55
Yeah, there's like,

spk_0:   51:55
What are you doing?

spk_1:   51:56
There is some serious Stockholm syndrome stuff going on here

spk_0:   52:00
I are. You hate this with a burning

spk_1:   52:02
passion. You're gonna hate it Maur in just a second because great, she she then just kind of like, accepts it. And she's like, fine, whatever. I've got a ship. And then they essentially role play the events of their first

spk_0:   52:14
meeting. What's There was nothing

spk_1:   52:16
sensual about their first meeting, where she's nearly in tears the entire time. And then he proposes to her out of nowhere

spk_0:   52:24
and then basically tells her it's either him or on one of the other scientists.

spk_1:   52:28
Yeah, but

spk_0:   52:28
she ain't leavin.

spk_1:   52:29
Yep, And she's like, initiates this, like, playful like play thing. It's so weird. Men writing women, That's that's probably what

spk_0:   52:38
that contributes to Yap. Yep, and I don't know what kind of like cultural norms would be typical,

spk_1:   52:46
but not this Yikes. So anyway, she as she's doing this like little role play thing, she says something a little different than what occurred 10 years ago. And Doman immediately become serious. And she said the thing that she mentioned was, Oh, but sir, I came here to stir up a revolt of your robots in like a playful tone, and he gets he like angry. Li repeats that phrase and like revolt of the robots. And then you just like nervous laughs and then denies that there was anything wrong in that. There's no way that that could ever happen because humans are easier to corrupt and robots, and he just kind of like nervous laughs the entire way out.

spk_0:   53:25
I see a robot revolt coming on.

spk_1:   53:27
Yeah, So then she goes into this monologue about how the world is now rejected robots. Oh, she reads like she finds like a newspaper about how the world is starting to smash all the robots to pieces and governments have taken over the robots. And now they're being used as soldiers. And the robots are fighting wars while they're all in like this island and just kind of producing more robots. Uh, and they're like the only producers of robots. So they're the ones shipping out all these robots with governments

spk_0:   53:55
to like every different government. I would assume,

spk_1:   53:57
Yeah, so Helena then gets like, panicky and asked if they can all leave because she feels like some force is about to fall on them, that they can't stop. When Doman says Sorry, they can't right now and the phone rings and he leaves and tells her not to leave. Helena asked the handmaiden to find more recent papers, and she can't. So they've been throwing out like the more recent papers that have been coming in. And eventually she finds one paper that they forgot to throw away. That says that the robots have assisted in assassinating 700,000 citizens like non soldiers,

spk_0:   54:31
Oh boy.

spk_1:   54:32
And that there is now starting to be rebellions popping up. And the governments are trying to kill all of the rebels with the robots. So the robot's formed a union and started spreading a manifesto. And then they also casually mentioned that humans haven't been born in a

spk_0:   54:48
few years. Oh, boy,

spk_1:   54:49
just in general, humans aren't being born anymore. I think later on we find out that that's because, um, the world almost reach utopia so people didn't have a need toe work, and without a need toe work, they didn't have a need to survive. So they started becoming infertile. Oh, Yep. Which reminds me of Darling in the Franks, cause that's what

spk_0:   55:07
happened. They

spk_1:   55:09
reached a utopia point, and they all of the people became infertile as they became immortal.

spk_0:   55:14
Yeah,

spk_1:   55:14
because there was no need to survive. Yeah, I had to find a way to sneak anime into their

spk_0:   55:18
Yeah, of course you did.

spk_1:   55:21
So then a scientist named al Qu'est comes into hell in his room and asked in Helena. Asked what the meaning of her new ships name is. It's called Ultimate CE, and he explains that it means the last. And asked if Doman had told her anything, she responds that he hasn't. He mentions that he's an old soul who is not too fond of this progress. And even he even recites a prayer that has a few words that are hoping that all of the scientists work is destroyed and that humans can return to toiling about like working. Okay, so this scientist is going crazy.

spk_0:   55:52
Yep. I mean, it sounds like everyone here is going crazy. So ah,

spk_1:   55:56
and their prayer also specifically says, Deliver us from the robot's protect Helena. Amen.

spk_0:   56:02
It's like the cult of Helena.

spk_1:   56:03
Yeah, it's Yep. So he says that destruction of humanity is insured unless and then she says. Yep, she does, she says. Unless

spk_0:   56:13
Oh, no, L. Quester

spk_1:   56:15
says goodbye and leaves.

spk_0:   56:17
What unless goodbye. Yep, that's an abrupt departure.

spk_1:   56:23
So Helena is that alone with her handmaiden? And she asked the handmade in What, what would happen if she burned the newspaper, and the handmade said, You can burn it And she says, Well, what if the newspapers were money? Would you say the same? And she says yes. And then she asked, What if it were the single greatest human invention? And the hem Main says yes, that she's also a religious woman like al Quist, and that she thinks that all progress is an aberration to God. So once all the papers are burned the handmade and asked Helena, what did she actually end up burning? And Helena reveals that she burnt the Ross. A manifesto that told everyone had to create robots

spk_0:   57:04
Who 00

spk_1:   57:07
yeah. So she's having a little rebellion of her own.

spk_0:   57:10
You go, Helena.

spk_1:   57:11
Yeah, 10 years too late. But that's all right.

spk_0:   57:12
Yeah. I mean, you should have run when you could, but hey, at least you're doing something.

spk_1:   57:17
Yep, So, just then all the scientists enter the room and they are mumbling about if they can tell Helena yet, and Doman says, Sure, it's all over now and then they just start chanting It's all over now. It's all over now. It's all over now. Like all of the scientists like this at all. Yep. So all the scientists are getting ready to board a ship to run and hide Helena's ship. Good. There is now a revolution of robots that there explaining to Helena and that the entire island this is for the last leg year has been surrounded by robots.

spk_0:   57:52
What, the bag? Yep. Oh, my goodness.

spk_1:   57:56
So the robots have taken over the firearms, railways, radios and ships and that this was six months ago. So six months ago is when the Revolution actually started, and they've just been keeping her in the dark about it on cheese. So they keep blathering about this timetable thing that was never explained at anywhere. Any other point in the story. They just keep talking about this timetable for a long time and how their their plan is that they're gonna wait out the rebellion on the ship with the manuscript helps people how to create robots.

spk_0:   58:29
You mean that thing that she just burn?

spk_1:   58:31
Mm. Well, they keep talking about this, How they're just gonna use that as their bargaining chip to stay alive once the fighting burns down. And there's just a super canned line from another scientist like, because they keep mentioning the manuscript at this point. And the canned line is, Well, it's our trump card. Never had the least bit of fear that the robots would ever gain power of over us. As long as we have this trump card, there's nothing that can go wrong. Oh, and now Helena is just openly weeping, just screaming, like, Why didn't you tell me? We need to leave now as quickly as possible. And then they all repeat we can't leave. We just started a new production line of robots.

spk_0:   59:08
Dear God, no, they're still making their

spk_1:   59:13
island is being surrounded by robots.

spk_0:   59:16
What is wrong with them?

spk_1:   59:18
Um, I also wanted to know that at this 0.1 of the scientists says rabbits instead of robots. And I thought that was funny, cause I assume I've always assumed that robe It's was like a modern, intentional mispronunciation. But

spk_0:   59:31
apparently no

spk_1:   59:33
one said robe, it's way back then. So as they're being taken over, the scientists are telling Helena how they're planning on making a factory in every country, and they're changing Rossen's universal robots to Rossen's national robots. So they're going to make the robots

spk_0:   59:48
look different, speak

spk_1:   59:49
different languages and be total strangers from each other

spk_0:   59:51
so that they can

spk_1:   59:52
start up wars of their own so that they can kill all of the robots on the planet. And humanity can have a fresh start.

spk_0:   59:59
God. But what about all the side that won the robot side? That one? Where you gonna do with all them?

spk_1:   1:0:05
Also? What about this utopia? That was your original plan, right? Because that's not a utopia.

spk_0:   1:0:11
No,

spk_1:   1:0:12
like you're intentionally just making them cycle through, because now they're saying that what they really want to happen is that another species owns the earth for a while, and they're trying to accelerate the rate at which that species dies off so that humans can come back and live longer again because they thought that humans, with the current cycle of war and death and everything, we're probably gonna kill each other out in 100 years anyways.

spk_0:   1:0:33
I mean, it's probably not that far from the truth,

spk_1:   1:0:35
but they made it happen in 10 years. So, like,

spk_0:   1:0:38
who really

spk_1:   1:0:39
won there Yeah. So they were waiting on this ship that was supposed to bring a few more scientists from the other lands and some supplies that they can last on their ultimate ship for X amount of years before the robots or while the robots take over and instead the they go, they go to the ship to get the supplies out. And the supplies air just filled with pamphlets.

spk_0:   1:1:03
Pamphlets For what?

spk_1:   1:1:05
For the robot International organizations. Oh, and it's their their manifesto where they have updated to say humans are declared our enemy. They are more developed. The man that that the robots are more developed, the man that robots are stronger and more intelligent. And now our order is to kill all humans. Spare no men, women or Children.

spk_0:   1:1:26
Oh, dear God!

spk_1:   1:1:28
So the sign to start to panic and they're like, OK, time to get on Ultimate and go. And the robots have already taken over ultimate ce the warship that he gave Helena as a anniversary gift,

spk_0:   1:1:38
of course.

spk_1:   1:1:40
And now we're at hope. Sorry. One more line. Hope so. They know that the robots have sounded what should be the noon factory whistle. But it's not noon, and this signals the end of their factory and the robots beginning to kill the humans.

spk_0:   1:1:55
Oh, eggs.

spk_1:   1:1:57
And we're on Act three.

spk_0:   1:1:58
Oh, my God, There's three act.

spk_1:   1:2:00
Yes, but this one's very short. So

spk_0:   1:2:04
I'm just

spk_1:   1:2:05
going to summarize this one, because literally nothing happens.

spk_0:   1:2:08
Okay?

spk_1:   1:2:09
The scientists are just going insane at this point, just like each other. One

spk_0:   1:2:14
of them

spk_1:   1:2:14
is literally doing their taxes

spk_0:   1:2:17
way. What?

spk_1:   1:2:18
Yeah, they're doing the taxes for the company and balancing the checkbooks in all of this stuff

spk_0:   1:2:23
is that like a coping mechanism must have been for them because, like, I obsessively make lists.

spk_1:   1:2:30
Yep. So one of the scientists goes out and tries to get a, um, a wire from their electrical room, and they tie it around offense. That's outside of Helena's window, because the robots are kind of lining up at that fence. So they're like, OK, if the robots try and storm the window, they're gonna touch the fence, and we can short circuit them. So at least one of them does something that's kind of survival ish,

spk_0:   1:2:52
I guess. A little bit

spk_1:   1:2:54
well, one of the guys freaks out, and he's just like I'm just gonna go negotiate with them

spk_0:   1:2:58
now, Guide.

spk_1:   1:2:59
So he runs out to go and talk with them and he realizes that they have tons of money because he was the guy who is doing all the balancing, eh? So he's like, I'm gonna go talk with them and then secretly goes and gets all of the money. No place and brings it all out there. And they're all watching as this guy is Watling. They say Watling awards the robots with just his briefcase overflowing with money. He has, like, a $1,000,000,000 or something like that, boy. Oh, no, it was half a 1,000,000,000. So 500 million. And he he gets to the robots and he's about to start speaking to them and he leans on the railing and kills himself because it's

spk_0:   1:3:37
electrified. My gosh there, when they were setting up that trap tries to

spk_1:   1:3:43
be also often just like leans on the railing and

spk_0:   1:3:44
oh, no. And then I'm sure that on the robots fall for the trap either because they just watch the dummy electrocuted.

spk_1:   1:3:50
They eventually decided that it's time to storm the place and a few of them do die when they first touched the railing. But they there's so many of them. And yeah, so they break in and kill everyone except for that person that I mentioned earlier. Al Quist, who is against, like, progress? The older gentleman who had that weird prayer they all like handed out guns is the robots were trying to storm in, and we're like, Okay for robot gets in, shoot him. We got to try and make our last stand here, and Alcoa says I will not shoot them and they're like, Ah, why won't you shoot them? He's like, No, Alcoa says, Well, guess I'll die F. And I'm like, That's a mean. That's funny.

spk_0:   1:4:32
Yeah, that is really good.

spk_1:   1:4:34
So the robot's pour through the windows and two of the scientists are killed, and then Helena and Doman run into her room to hide, and then you hear both of them get killed, and then another guy gets killed out in the hallway, who was like hunkering down like tryingto you know, duck and cover kind of a thing. Hide. And then one of the robot's brings out L Quist, who didn't shoot

spk_0:   1:4:55
Oh, good,

spk_1:   1:4:56
and asked, Do we kill this one because they didn't shoot. And that's when Radius the robot I mentioned earlier that was having issues and feels himself to be the ringleader of the whole robot organization and says that they won't shoot and that they'll keep him because that the world of men has fallen.

spk_0:   1:5:14
So basically, he's now their pet.

spk_1:   1:5:16
Yeah, that's exactly what they want is to just do work like they wanted him to do work. So it's completely switched around.

spk_0:   1:5:23
Uh,

spk_1:   1:5:24
one thing that I forgot to mention in here is originally they Doman, the crazy guy who tried to get will successfully got Helen and Mariam pulls out a rifle and is like, I'm gonna shoot the leader.

spk_0:   1:5:39
Boy,

spk_1:   1:5:40
Helen was like, No, don't shoot him. And he's like, Okay, you're right. I hope these robots are grateful that I didn't just kill them. Maybe I Maybe they'll respond to gratefulness in that we could have just shot one of them and we didn't. And then they'll save us because of that. They were loonies.

spk_0:   1:5:55
Yeah, they sound absolutely insane.

spk_1:   1:5:58
Yeah, So anyways, there is an epilogue because that was the end of Act three. And the epilogue is Al qu'est sitting at a desk trying to figure out how to make robots. Because Helena burned the yet on how to make robots. And the robots are starting to get really antsy because they have, for it's only been a year, and they've completely filled up the world with the different things that they've created.

spk_0:   1:6:22
Oh, good,

spk_1:   1:6:22
because they're robots. They're built to work The

spk_0:   1:6:24
ray. Yeah,

spk_1:   1:6:25
so they were making all these things for future generations. But there can't be future generations without the book because the bucks telling burned yet So they're like threatening to try and, you know, kill him. And he's like, Kill me, whatever. I don't care. I'm the last human. Please, what are you going to do? I'm the only one who could solve this for you so they don't kill him, and he eventually just gets really frazzled and goes and passes out. He just goes and goes to sleep because he said that he hasn't slept in a long time. And as as he's asleep, all the other robots leave and two robots walk in and one of them is named prime Ms. And one of them is named Helena.

spk_0:   1:7:02
Wait a second.

spk_1:   1:7:03
Yep. So Promise and Helena are like bickering and, like people do like just around al Qu'est as he's passed out, and they talk about dying for a little bit, and they talk about how there's this weird language that they both speak in their sleep that none of them can make sense of, and the weird, mangled language makes them want to die. But Helena talks about finding a garden with some puppies, and she loves them and Promise proclaims that he is the strongest robot in Helena is the most beautiful, and they burst out laughing at. They're kind of like their situation of never being able like they know they're going to die. Robots are dying out. There is nothing that robots can d'oh! And so they just start laughing. And when they burst out laughing, laughing, Al Qu'est wakes up and wonders where the humans are because somewhere in this whole thing, they mentioned that a robot has never smiled. A robot has never laughed, and they gave them the ability to do this, but they never have. They only do that like gnashing teeth thing, huh? So he wakes up and thinks that they're humans. And when they're not humans, he goes, I need to dissect you now like he's finally like, Got to. He's like, This is something that if I dissected, I might learn how to make these robots again. And both of them are like, No, don't dissect this one. Dissect. Dissect me instead, and then they'll stand in front of each other like No, don't dissect her. My life would be meaningless without her kind of a thing. And they just keep doing this like trying to one up each other like No, it's my I'm the one who's going to die to save you because I love you or whatever. And Al Quist puts up his hand in, tells them to stop and that neither of them will die. And, ah, he says his last. The last sentence of the play, which is Go Adam, Go Eve. The world is yours. So he kind

spk_0:   1:8:43
of

spk_1:   1:8:43
accepts that they're like the new Adam and Eve of the generation, because they're the first robots who are actually human because they could laugh.

spk_0:   1:8:51
Interesting. Yeah,

spk_1:   1:8:53
and that's when the curtain falls and

spk_0:   1:8:55
I will say, I don't hate like where it ended up, but I hated the journey.

spk_1:   1:9:00
Oh, my God. It was the thing I was mentioning before when you said that the like, Oh, are the scientists robots? I think there was a really clever thing that the that the voice actors did which may be part of this, like, really broken sentences that we've been kind of attributing to like, bad translation. It could be a part of his Well, is to me after I started thinking about it while I'm doing the writing of these notes and everything, the scientists always sounded more robotic than the robots, huh? And the robots always sounded more human than the scientists whenever they were talking. So I almost think that that was intentional. That that was kind of like a a plot device that they were using. Like to try and get the reader into thinking that, like, these people are less human than the robots. Because that's where the story ended up was

spk_0:   1:9:52
right.

spk_1:   1:9:52
There are some robots that are more human than anyone that has been in this play other than like Helena.

spk_0:   1:9:58
Yeah, one

spk_1:   1:9:58
of them happens to be named Helena for some reason.

spk_0:   1:10:01
Yeah, definitely. Like strikes me that way. I think it's very interesting. That's

spk_1:   1:10:06
why I like SciFi in in

spk_0:   1:10:08
giant size. So much fun like it's really cool.

spk_1:   1:10:11
Yeah, because I was just mad at this whole play this entire time because of how badly they were treating Helena and that they were just kind of like they were awful. The scientists were just awful. And then, like you had Al Quest every once in a while, who like, seemed like the crazy one because he wasn't as awful as

spk_0:   1:10:25
everyone else. Oh, sorry.

spk_1:   1:10:29
Don't punch the mike.

spk_0:   1:10:30
I, like, scratched myself to hurt who,

spk_1:   1:10:34
anyways, that that was watching Rossen's universal robots First. It was the first SciFi to ever be on TV, and it is where the term robot comes from,

spk_0:   1:10:45
and they use the word robot. A lot of sounds like,

spk_1:   1:10:48
Yes, it was everywhere. It was like off the cuff thing like robot was the main theme.

spk_0:   1:10:53
It's interesting that it's the 1st 1 that used the term robot, but it used it so

spk_1:   1:10:59
much. Yeah, normally, you see, like first introductions of a word,

spk_0:   1:11:03
our leg himself leading, Yeah, right, But

spk_1:   1:11:06
the whole thing cool. So let's move on to our call to action because we are way over time. My

spk_0:   1:11:11
gosh, This time it wasn't my fault. It

spk_1:   1:11:14
was my fault. So you can visit us at half wit. Dash history dot com. You can find us on Facebook and Twitter at half wit. History, history. You can send us an email at half wit pot at gmail dot com, and we have a KO phi coffee, whatever that is. Ko dash f i dot com forward slash halfway history.

spk_0:   1:11:36
Yeah, um, throw

spk_1:   1:11:38
a few bucks our way because we put a lot of money into our new recording. Set up?

spk_0:   1:11:43
Yes. Buy me a coffee. Um,

spk_1:   1:11:46
it's fine. We really just hope you enjoy it.

spk_0:   1:11:48
Yeah, it's I mean, we have fun doing it. So

spk_1:   1:11:51
we have gotten a few donors, though.

spk_0:   1:11:53
It's a labor of love. Yeah, but yes. Oh, we'd super appreciate any comments, feedback, um, topic ideas, anything like that. If there's something that, you know, maybe you've heard of, and you don't really know a lot about it Or like something that, like you absolutely love and you want to hear it get covered on the show. Just you're just an email and we're more than happy to check those things out and see what we can do.

spk_1:   1:12:16
Yeah, absolutely. Just I personally would appreciate if you send dates, because then I could just plan way ahead, like, Oh, I thought that this thing that someone sent in was interesting as well. I'll just plop it in my calendar. So when we get to that week, that's what I'm gonna do.

spk_0:   1:12:30
Yeah. See, I'm less worried about that, because if someone sends a topic idea, I can just look it up. And then no. When the data is so, I I don't really care either way. But send Jonathan dates. Yes,

spk_1:   1:12:41
I do the producing for this. So I would like as little time added as

spk_0:   1:12:45
possible also a big thank you to Ashley for helping us out with the finding of events. I guess it's probably related.

spk_1:   1:12:54
Yeah, she takes the some

spk_0:   1:12:55
of the really like the background kind of preliminary

spk_1:   1:12:58
stuff. Yeah, So actually goes and looks through all the websites that we normally look through and filters down to what she thinks we would find interesting to talk about. And she normally has, like, a list of, like, 15 or so per day.

spk_0:   1:13:11
Yeah, and they're a nice, like smattering of different ideas. So, like, there's almost always something that, like, I'd be really interested in her. Jonathan be interested in that

spk_1:   1:13:18
kind of thing. Yeah, so thank you. Actually, we really appreciate it.

spk_0:   1:13:21
You're definitely saving her, but because we have what? 129 days Until we have a wedding.

spk_1:   1:13:26
Oh, my God. We're gonna have to get a few episodes ahead at some point.

spk_0:   1:13:29
Yeah, because then we have our honeymoon. We're going to Disney.

spk_1:   1:13:35
Yeah, I just figured that out yet. Well, anyways, um, thank you to the fishermen for the use of our theme song. Another day you can find the link to their soundcloud down in our show notes.

spk_0:   1:13:46
Go check him out.

spk_1:   1:13:46
Yes. Very awesome guy.

spk_0:   1:13:48
Yeah. Fun fact fun facts. I have a few

spk_1:   1:13:52
so you can go first.

spk_0:   1:13:53
Oh, my All right. Wow. I'm gonna go with I'm actually going to jump on your train this time around, and I'm going to go with February 14th 1931. The original Dracula film starring Bela Lugosi as the titular vampire is released. I talked

spk_1:   1:14:13
about Bela Lugosi. Oh,

spk_0:   1:14:15
I know and that that was part of the reason I did it. But also, it was released on Valentine's Day. Yeah, imagine that being your Valentine's Day date, you'd love it. I believe.

spk_1:   1:14:27
I wonder if they did the same thing that Ryan Reynolds did for the release of Deadpool Deadpool was

spk_0:   1:14:31
released on Valentine's Day,

spk_1:   1:14:33
and all of the billboards made it look like a romcom.

spk_0:   1:14:35
Oh, my God, that was hilarious. Yeah, but I just I found it really funny that Dracula was released

spk_1:   1:14:41
on Valentine's Day. Yeah, I'm gonna stick with my SciFi theme on February 13th of 2000 for the Harvard Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics announces the discovery of the universe's largest known diamond, a wife door of star named BPM. 37093 Astronomers named a star Lucy after the Beatles song Lucy. That's funny. So it's cute as always. I've been your half wit

spk_0:   1:15:11
and then your historian, and we hope you listen by